countdown was, fuck nothing good at all. sorry you both for shouting, i just felt totally fucked up at that point of time. anw, saw dd & her friend after the fireworks & stuff & i broke down for God knows what reason. school's starting & soon it'll be after o's already..

my dad just psycho-ed me like crazy on the way to tampines mall today & i almost died. he was ranting about my mum & like wth i totally switched off.

anw, new phone came along (: thats the only thing i'm (: about today.



this would be the last time,
i'd cry for you again.

just give me countdown 2007 with you,
i'd be more than contended.


went all the miles,
just to see you wearing that gnir.
fuck.

all these insecurities, take them away.
come with me & everything will be right.


24 dec,
went over to nsm's place to wake her up then cabbed to clarke quay to look for restaurants for xmas dinner. town after that & i swear we walked alot, haha. wasn't really feeling well & her father sent us back to her place. lyanne & chuyin came then over to church for mass (: after that, to sihui's house! :D played ddr, watched some scary show, drank absolut citron & we got high, haha! slept only at 730 am :/

25 dec,
woke up at 3 plus pm, ordered pizza. only went out at 9 pm to clarke quay. met wanru bel & juli there. oh, & we sat trishaw to kim seng plaza for pool. whalao, it was my first time on a bloody trishaw lah & the uncle was damn funny, haha. nsm! :D cabbed back at 12 plus am. supposed to sing till next morning but juli & lyanne slept damn early lah ): was talking to gerri anw, so yeah (: slept only at 6 am, haha. & it doesn't feel like christmas at all, cause we spent the whole day sleeping :/

today,
dinner was cancelled again ): ordered macs instead then juli lyanne nsm & i went to lot 1 for night at the museum. its damn funny & the popcorn is never ending, haha! juli & i totally look the same cause we were wearing the same boxers & polo tee to lot 1, haha :D went back at 10 then home ):

i agree with nsm that it feels like we stay together lah, haha. anw, wakeboarding on thurs! i hope i'll have the mood to go.


& i swear, if you come back in my life
i'll be there till the end of time.

nothing could be worse than this,


i need to study damn badly :/ there's mock exam on 5th jan A maths & i think i'm gonna flunk it.

went to aly's place yesterday (: reached around evening time, was at town before that. went over with girlfriend & csh. phy juli kim mich & steph came later then cut cake for aly, haha. happy birthday aly! (: drank wine & played bluff again :D played a while only cause aly was drunk, haha. many things happened, kinda lazy to blog it out though, haha. around 1 plus am, phy csh wanru jiarui juli & i went down & talked (: wha talked about lots of stuff. watched some movie at 4 plus. csh wanru & i crashed at 430 am cause i woke up damn early that morning to run :/ left then over to sumay's place. her house's like food heaven, haha. went for farewell at crystal's place after that, & i saw twin! (:


& i can't deny that its still you, that i'm longing for.
take my hand now, & bring me to a place where only love can be found.

fuck what i said,


i'm gonna stay home tmr, i'm gonna study (:

met girlfriend in the afternoon then over to heeren to meet aly. vinee came & sophia chess & phy joined us at level 9 later. caught silent hill. next time ask question must say 'question mark' at the end, haha! inside joke man. oh sihui came too! then over to kaki 5. kim & mich came too, then home around 11 :D

kim, good friend good friend, haha.

oh, i'm collecting my specs tmr! haha. so funny lah, the eyeplay people msged to tell me its ready for collection.

ling ling, i miss you! ): celine wong yee mong, you too & i don't know where you disappeared to lah :/


after all, i still miss you :/

fuck everything thats happening in my life now.

there's never a day I don't think about you.
my mind's a mess & my heart's in distress.
often I wonder about the things you do,
please don't forsake me cause my heart is true.
this love for you can never be measured,
just come on home to me Thats all that matters.

I'll always be true to you,
its not only a feeling but an endless concept.
how i love this feeling for you,
it is the real thing I can almost taste it.

don't you know my heart is pumping hope
Its putting out the fight,
I got this feeling that everything's alright.
don't you see,
i'm not the only one for you
but you're the only one for me.


okay, went downtown east at noon & pooled with dad bro & fidelia. fidelia's my bro's gf though, haha. she gave me a shock lah, cause i was buying drinks & she suddenly appear next to me :/ haha. played pool with her & i won :D headed to chalet & i slept there for the whole afternoon, haha. mum came later then cut cake for my bro & grandma :D so funny lah cause my bro's friends were like amusing themselves. there's one girl, i can't remember her name but she's damn cute lah, haha. my dad just said she's very kind & nice & she started doing all the chores for us, wth right haha. came home, may be going back but i don't feel like :/ anw, i'm supposed to send someone breakfast tmr :D

donkey, i'll miss you & please remember to pick me up on 3rd of jan 2007, haha. don't so sad lah cheer up alright. this feeling's kinda suck but its just for now, you'll just regret if you don't meet -. so just meet no matter what okay! :D take lots of care there yeah, hugs.


don't tell me i'll make it on my own,
cause you know i can't.

sorry gf, i know even a thousand apologies won't help but i don't know what else to do. take care <3


church this morning by myself & i was kinda yawning away cause its 830 am :/ chalet later on then prob staying over (: i don't feel like going home. school's starting, kinda dreading it but quite anticipating as well, haha. town yesterday with jo cookie lyanne then sophia came (: esplanade at night with them. cookie & lyanne were damn retarded on the bus there cause they were imitating jo & i, haha.


Because of you Even if For all time The special two (:

I won't take this damage anymore,
just don't turn your back on me.


didn't turn up for training today :/ anyway it'll be the last for this year i suppose? haha.

monster came over for a while, she woke me up damn early like 9 plus? ugh, haha. town to meet twin & saw chuyin & olivia. its been damn long since i see olivia, haha. twin got her stuff then met girlfriend & kim (: walk around then gelare at far east to sit down, haha. sihui came after a while then walk back to cine. lover & xyz came then pool at meridien. home damn early today & it felt damn weird :/

happy birthday psychic! (:

cass is sooo irritating! i'm talking to her now & she's damn irritating, haha.

Yesterday i got lost in circles,
feeling like such a mess.
Now i'm down i'm just hanging on the corner
& i can't help but reminisce.
When you're gone colours seem to fade.


went over to godmum's office to study, haha. actually my godmum's sophia's mother :D we got damn high watching some video on youtube, haha. studied JLC for a while then started talking about plans & back up plans for something (: left around 6 plus to meet swr then over to vivo to meet nsm & her siblings! (: they're damn cute lah, haha. shopped for their stuffs at GAP. swr & i totally felt like sales rep there please :D

i'm going out with twin tmr & i can't wait, haha.


& i want to give to you,
more than the sunshines upon your lovely face.

I tried to be perfect, but nothing was worth it.
I don't believe it makes me real
I thought it'd be easy, but no one believes me.
I meant all the things i said,
when i say i love you.

fuck, i miss you ): you never know, you never know that you're actually making things difficult for me. & i'm tired of being all alone.

so I'm walking down the street
feeling lonely & sad.
couples walking hand in hand, looking mighty glad
everytime i think of you,
the tears appear.


training in school & i think its damn weird suddenly, haha. monster came too :D went tiong for lunch with them then bused to town to meet chess (: walked around & stuff, talked quite alot too, haha. then, over to red lounge to join wanru nobel sumay sihui & bel (: they left for movie then we went over to suntec to look for specs, haha. saw lover & xinyi at the bus stop too! many retarded things happened in the bus & i swear we got laughing gas, haha! chess wanted to show rachel some spastic picture of me, i grabbed the phone back & pulled some woman's hair too! :D thats damn funny, haha! okay, suntec then marina square then bugis then back to raffles city to get chess's wallet from esprit. there's like so many people shopping there & we both agree that s'poreans are rich, haha. oh, & i saw gerri the goondoo sami at cine too (: haha.


ding! not forgetting abt you man :D


Just so you know,

spending all my nights
doing anything just to get you off my mind
But when the morning comes,
& i'm back where i started again.
trying to forget you is just a waste of time.

happy birthday celine (: though you won't see this cause you're in japan, in anyway you're 15 already! come back soon ):

& happy birthday novelynteoh, icy cold sane cow :D enjoy your day & i hope it'll be a blast (:

supposed to attend 1045 mass this morning but chuyin couldn't wake up, so went over to sumay's place first. & i realised her very funny maid's not working there anymore ): i swear her maid's a damn happy go lucky person cause she's happy almost everytime i see her & its kinda very often i go over to sumay's place, so yeah. anw, cabbed to jln jurong kechil for prata breakfast :D then bused to church & sumay is like busy looking out for cute babies the whole time :/ headed to island creamery just to get a drink, haha. then home (:

training tomorrow then prob out with icy cold to celebrate her birthday, haha. i want the topman jacket & i'm gonna get it :D


all day long wearing a mask of false bravado,
trying to keep up a smile that hides a tear.
But as the Sun goes down i get that empty feeling again,
how i wish to God that you were here.

I have your photo, i see your face
But i can't see you walk, i can't feel your grace.
I want you here With me face to face
Because i long for our First embrace.


went over to twin's place today, its like after so long (: caught transporter but stopped halfway. talked alot, caught up & stuff (: left rather early cause girlfriend called & wanted to meet up for dinner, haha. met sumay & chuyin too in town, crystal jade then home ):

i'm sick again, & i think this time jo passed me the germs :/ hahaha.


love me for a reason,
& let the reason be Love.

Though you love another, i still love you the same.


Te amo, You (:

This time I'll say I love You everytime we speak,
make you my priority,
be your strength when you're weak.
This time whenever you call me I'll be there,
no matter what I'm doing I will come no matter where.
This time I'll give you all the loving that I got,
say the right things,
I don't want to lose what I got.
& I don't want to hurt no more,
let your guard down baby,
open up your door & let me in.


why is it each time a step closer i try, i fail. if i spend some time without you i thought i'd be okay but, i can't forget you i tried but it didn't work out that way. I'm not the one who broke you, I'm not the one you should fear. I thought i lost You somewhere But you were never really ever there at all. & i don't need the fallout Of all the past that's in between Us. I find a fatal flow in the logic of Love & go out of my head. Let the hurt take its time, I don't mind waiting. I'll keep holding on till the heartache's gone. All the might have beens & the never will be's They could never take your place. Take your sweet sweet time I'll be here when You change your mind, nobody got me loving like You did i'm damn right it just gotta be You.

If parting is a sweet sorrow, why does this still taste bitter, against my lips?
Or is it a blessing in disguise?
We tread so carefully between every piece & promises that matters most.
Shadows faded, kept me contained
Shadows faded, now seem far away.

A breathe & its gone but it lingers, reminds me to feel something.
take my hand, my everything Take this heart & soul to keep,
chokehold & don't let me breathe.


goodbye world (:

never gone, never far in my heart thats where You are.

my bro's d/ling step up in the comp & i can so fast forward to the dance part & keep replaying it like non-stop (:

supposed to go tanning with gerrisami & claudonkey, but they're sick so changes of plan ): met claud in town first then wanru & kelly & nobel came. gerri came after a while then pool with gerri claud & trico at level 8. i suddenly don't really like playing pool anymore, no kick! met jiarui aly jobelle juli they all then walked to far east with claud later. talked quite alot & its really frustrating & stressful! ugh. they say there's firewords at vivo tonight but i don't see it :/



absence makes the heart grow fonder.